Thankful for my blessings

Lots going on around here. Hubby and our youngest at scout camp. Our college boy just got back from a canoe trip with our college ministry. Our daughter is still going strong at band camp. Tommy is missing out this week because of scout camp but I think he is probably suffering in this heat a bit down there. In the middle of all this, there are still things going on. Dr's appointments, dentist appointments, enrollment for school filled out and ready for next week. Then the normal things families have to do, oh and yeah I forgot, I am packing up a storm! 11 days till we move!! Talk about crazy! So I am sitting here thinking of all the things I am thankful for.

My husband, who has stood by me for all these years, (20+) how could I not be thankful for him?! He is something else. You who know him, know what I mean. I told him the other day that I mentioned him in my blog and he said "Me? why would anyone want to hear about me? I am NOT important!" Then he smiled that ornery smile of his and went on about what he was doing. When my life gets crazy or I begin to over think things, he brings me back to where I need to be and reminds me everything will be alright. Wish he was here right now to remind me of that, I am just a bit freaked out! He makes me laugh, makes me smile, makes me crazy but he is my best friend and my perfect mate! He is a godly role model for our children and loves us so very much! I am SO thankful to God for him. See this is my blog so I can brag all I want about him and he can't do a thing about it! :) Love you honey!!

Then of course I am thankful for my kids! They are all special in their own way and have made my life better just by being my kids! They too make me laugh, make me cry, make me crazy, but bring so much joy to our home. I can honestly say I would not be the same person without them in my life. Even their constant picking on me out of fun about how short I am, makes me smile! They bring so much depth and sincerity to my life, things I would have never imagined discussing with them, has come up. It just makes my heart happy to know they feel they can come to me about anything. I love the sound of teenagers in my house! Well for that matter, the sound of any kids in my house! My kids make my heart grow fuller with love every single day! Love you all bunches!!

Also thankful for my brother and sis in law and my sweet nephew Jake! What a joy it is to have them in my life! Words cannot express how much I love them or how much they mean to me. Tony and Autum and I have practically grown up together! We have been through things only families that love each other can endure. Then sweet little Jake came along and just brightened our world even more. I love that boy to pieces!! He reminds me of his daddy quite often when he was little. Thank you Lord for the blessing of these three. My life would not be complete and my heart would not be whole without them! Love you always you three!!! So blessed to have you in our lives!

Then of course my Mom and Bud's parents! Life would not be complete without parents! Thank you for guiding us and standing by us! And for loving us even when we were not so lovable and even when you did not understand us. We are blessed and thankful and love you very much! And I am also thankful for my Dad who is not with us anymore, he went to be with Jesus in 1994 but is forever part of my life and in my thoughts and on my heart! Love ya Dad! Miss you tons! All these people have taught me the best they know how, how to be an adult! Thank you for that!

Then there are those in your life who you cannot begin to imagine how they came to choose you as their friends but are blessed everyday to know they are there for you no matter what. God just somehow brought them into your life for a reason. There are time I cannot begin to imagine my life without them, when did I NOT know them. Seems they have always been there. Seems they have always cared. Not only about me, but about my husband and my kids and that for me is priceless! So to my very special friends out there who have stood by us through all these years. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and I love you very much! To The Landis's, seems we have been friends since the very first time we met! God just brought us together and we clicked! Our kids love each other and get along great with each other and we always had something in common or something we just HAD to do together! What would our lives be like if our sweet little girls had not met each other way back in kindergarten? My life would NOT be the same. Thank you for loving us and caring about us and understanding the depths of our hearts! We love you SO SO SO very much and I know our friendship must have been ordained in heaven because otherwise you would never have any reason to stick by us all this time. I love you all very much and it is my privilege to watch your sweet kids grow into remarkable godly young adults! Thank you for allowing us to be your friends and allowing us to be part of your lives! Your the best!!

Then there are some other friends whom I confide in and know my heart is better for knowing you and loving you. To Betty: You are like my Sister, you crazy silly woman I love you to pieces!! You make me laugh so hard I can barely breathe sometimes. Then I laugh harder because I am laughing. I sometimes forget why I am laughing but I always know you my sweet friend, bring joy and laughter to my life! My heart is always lifted and I never wanna leave when we have spent time together! Thank you for loving my tater tots as your own! You are a remarkable blessing and I love you and sweet Miss Angela with all my heart and soul and your sweet Cuban family as well! I am truly blessed to have walked in the bus lot all those years ago and was able to call you my friend!! 14 years later, you still make me laugh so hard I wanna cry! Love you Sis!!

Then there is Teri, girl what can I say about you other than I love you bunches and you truly have grown up with me, what was I like 14 or something when we met? Maybe younger who knows. I liked you from the very beginning and our friendship has grown so much through all these years! Love ya tons and I am so grateful you are coming back home so we can spend more time together. We have endured quite a lot in our years together and I am just thankful God has kept us together. Love you sweetie!!

Last but by no means least is my sweet friend Jenny! I cannot tell you how much your friendship means to me. You have been there for me the last few months when I cannot think straight, but you have stood by me! I love your kids and I love you very much! I am so thankful God brought you into my life! You mean the world to me! Now don't be upset I have no pictures of you but I think we need to remedy that! Love ya sweetie, thank you for being my friend! I know God will continue to bless this new friendship and I look forward to lots more time together. Thanks for loving all of us!

Also I must not forget a sweet young lady who recently came into our lives by way of our oldest son. Lizzie you have brought so much love and joy to Ernie's life and I am thankful that you are part of our lives as well. We all love you very much and are thankful you make Ernie happy. Look forward to spending more time with you and watching the two of you together as well. Love you sweetheart!!

Now just because I have not mentioned you by name on this blog please don't think I am not thankful for my other sweet friends and family out there. You all have played a special part of my life and I love you very much too. I just don't have room to put everyone on here. Although I would if I could get away with it! LOL :) Each of you have came into my life for a reason and I am so very thankful that you are part of my life. I pray that each one I have mentioned and each one I have not will know you have a special place in my heart and I pray will walk along side of us in this journey we call life and this journey of adoption. I love you all and am truly blessed more than I could ever imagine. Thank you Lord for you overflowing blessings and your faithfulness to love me through these people and through your word and our church family! I don't deserve these blessing but I am SO thankful for them!

Truly blessed today!! :) and thinking of my Ladybug as well :)

God's blessings are abundant

I have been wanting to share this for awhile but I had to make SURE it was really happening. Someone pinch me because I cannot believe it! Let me try and explain this without making this SO long that everyone drifts off. God is bigger than we can even think or imagine. So I will try to downsize it as best as I can without taking the praise away from Him.

Earlier this spring, an opportunity came to us by pure chance, well now we know it wasn't chance it was GOD! There was a close friend of mine (Hey Jenny!) who had a friend who was trying to sell their house. It is a beautiful house and something I have only dreamed of. I told Jenny we weren't ready to buy a house quite yet but I would drive by and look at it. She told her friend that we would like to buy again someday. So her friend contacted me, and I explained the situation and she understood. I said maybe we could rent it but there is no way we are ready to buy quite yet. Well she talked to her hubby, he liked the idea and said they would talk about it. Jenny had said that it would be cool if we could rent it from them too. It was kind of her idea too.

Well of course we prayed about it and reminded God we were headed for adoption and did not want to go anywhere He didn't want us and that didn't lead us to China. I kept praying, the more I prayed the more I kept thinking of this house, and wonderful it would be for our daughter to come home there but I didn't want that if HE did not want us to have it. So after awhile my hubby and her hubby talked things out and it just didn't seem to work out for them. I understood. I was confused that when I prayed I asked God to take the thoughts of that house out of my head if He didn't want us to have it, and somehow they kept popping in there. I was confused but again I thought OK Lord we were not suppose to be there, I understand, that is NOT the path to China. I was completely OK with it all, content, not upset a bit.  I know I discussed this on this blog about a door being closed. This was that door. The house would have given us enough room for our China doll and more kiddo's if that were ever the case, so I guess I was sorta stopped in my tracks. I knew however that if God called us to this He would provide whatever means necessary to get us there. Whether this house was involved or not.

Fast forward a few weeks ago. I got a call from Jenny's friend, who is quickly becoming our friend too now. She said that she had an idea wondered if we would be interested. So I called her back and wouldn't ya know it. They had worked some things out and still wanted us to rent this house with the hopes of buying it soon. I wanted to tell everyone right then, but I waited. I had prayed about this for so long earlier this spring and the door closed so I was not gonna just jump right into it. I prayed even more now and I really finally left the decision up to my husband. I knew he didn't have an emotional investment in this so it would be better if he made the decision alone. Boy was that hard, not putting my two cents in. He talked with his men's bible study group and asked them to pray and I had friends of mine praying. We talked to people who care about us and love us to get their opinion and bounce things off of them. Everyone was saying yes, do this! I have to tell ya, I really just left my hubby completely alone about this. I knew that if God wanted us to have this, and this truly was the way we were to go for China, then He would surely put it on his heart. About a week later he finally sat down with me and said, "Honey we should do this, I just feel God telling us to do this and with lots of counsel from others I feel this is the right thing to do." I was so stinking happy and yet so scared out of my mind.

I was not prepared to move, we are in the middle of band camp and school starts in a few weeks, so our schedule is hectic and then to up and move the whole house in the midst of this was crazy. Oh and did I mention the guys leave on Sunday to go to scout camp for 10 days? Some other things have happened in the last couple days that has prompted us to move quicker than expected. I took a look at our busy schedule and decided the only weekend we could possibly move in the next few months would be the first weekend of August. Yes that is just a few weeks away! Am I crazy? well ya just a bit, but you do not understand marching season, it gets crazy busy all the way up till the end of October. Normally I am so stressed at moving I freak out a bit. I have moved so many times in my life I cannot begin to count them, and they always stress me out. This, this is different. I am not stressed about anything. We called our new friends and they were fine with the move in date. We even found someone who was giving away free boxes, so God took care of that too. Everything seems to be working out very smoothly. I wonder if I should worry. Then I remember my prayers from earlier. Lord if this is what you want, please work out all the details, and He has indeed! And I still continue to pray if this is not where you want us to go please close the door now. He has left it wide open. I could almost weep. Well I have the last couple days at His majesty!

See I have to tell you a little thing about me. I have never lived in a place that was simply beautiful. We had some nice places growing up and a few when we got married but nothing that when I looked at it thought "WOW that is beautiful!" and I have always been OK with that. I am a simple humble girl. Never grew up with much but I had love. I have always felt I didn't deserve much either. I am not sure why maybe it was because never having much makes you appreciate the things you did have. So to be offered such a beautiful home I truly feel we do not deserve it. We have not earned it, nor could we ever. It is too good to be true. So I keep waiting for God to close the door to this blessing. He has remained standing with it wide open. I truly truly still feel we don't deserve it. We have messed up enough in life to see our mistakes and still reel from living from some of them. It is hard. On one hand I feel we have to earn things by works. So this we have not yet worked to get. Somehow though God keeps reminding me of His grace. He reminds me, I have covered your sin a long time ago, stop holding on to it and let it go. Your sins are as far away as the east is from the west because I have paid them for you. Stop beating yourself up about it. I am offering you grace, mercy and forgiveness, please take it.

I am doing the best I can to accept His gift of grace and mercy. I have never had someone love me SO much! So in a few short weeks we will take the huge blessing God has handed us and use it to honor Him in every way we can. Will it lead to China? I am praying it does. But if He has other plans for us I will follow HIM wherever He leads. Because His grace is enough! and His blessings are abundant for those who love Him and serve Him!

Father I pray right now that you help us to use this gift to further your kingdom and may You and our new friends not be disappointed in anything we may do. Let it all be for your glory! Walk with us each step of the way so that we stay on your plans path. Thank you Lord for always staying with us and carrying us when we cannot go on any further on our own. I pray you bless our new sweet friends abundantly beyond their wildest dreams. Thank you Father for all your plans. Plans to prosper and not to harm us to give us HOPE and a future, and China someday!! Thank you for the place that will be our new home in just a few weeks!! 

Your blessings are so abundant

Always thankful for Your love and sacrifice and your overflowing blessings!!!!

Truly blessed today, and lots of ladybugs :)

Life is Swirling

Lots of things going through my mind today. I posted some pictures on my facebook page that got me thinking about the summer so far...

We started off with summer school and that flew by. Then came my birthday we decided that we would go to The WWI museum and learn something. My boys (including the big one) loves anything about history, so this may have been MY birthday but I could not resist letting them enjoy this time, I wanted to see it too. It took us two days to visit because of the rain. The high tower lined with copper at the top is not open during storms, so we had to go back a second day when it had stopped storming to visit that, which worked out well with our passes too.

 It was a very interesting couple of days to say the least! We learned a lot and left there so appreciative of all our armed forces both past and present. There were lots of statistics revealed in this memorial that were just staggering to say the least. So thank you to all those out there who have served or are serving our country. We would not be "FREE" without you and without our Jesus! We left there and decided to go down to the plaza and just walk around a bit. There was one store we wanted to show Sis, a culinary store that we KNEW she would love, and she did love it indeed. So we rounded the corner and found this, which made my heart happy and sad at the same time

This was left from the Dragon Boat Festival from the day before that got rained out, It was beautiful but made me think of our ladybug! Right smack in the middle of my birthday weekend, God Reminded me of China and our daughter. How do you deal with that when your not wanting to think about it because it is to painful at this point? Then there was this too,

All these beautiful Chinese Lanterns! and this

Again right here in the middle of the Midwest! I felt my heart flutter again for China. This looks to me to be some sort of Chinese guard. I am sure I am wrong so if someone knows what it is exactly I would LOVE to know. So for a split second we felt a family of six looking at these. Heart warming and heart wrenching. I sometimes wonder why God gives me reminders that is so painful, but then I remember how much JOY I receive as well remembering His promise. It was a good day indeed!

The next weekend was Father's day so out we went to celebrate. Bud had his special dinner and he wanted to golf. Now let me explain, my hubby is NOT a golfer so this was an interesting choice. We went to the local driving range, all of us! And spent the day out there shooting buckets of balls and he LOVED it! He was sore a bit afterwards but he LOVED it!

Here he is with his first shot, course the kids HAD to join in!

Ernie looks like a pro, course he had some lessons from his awesome Uncle too! :)

Tommy is checking to see how far his ball actually went, hasn't had those lessons from his Uncle yet but did good none the less.

Then it was Vickie's turn, she may be coordinated with a flag in her hand but that golf club made me a wee bit nervous, the smile made up for it though, don't ya think?

She finally went "girly" on me and this is what happened! She wanted to see how far her ball would actually go in this position. I tell you I laughed SO hard at this! Her uncle would be proud LOL

It was a fun day celebrating Bud and him being a wonderful Father all these years! I love my husband very much and I could never have asked for a better Father to our children. God knows what He is doing when he matches children and parents! I truly believe that! What a blessing He is to our family and I will never be able to thank God enough for the wonderful gift of my husband! We really have raised our kids together, through everything. Diaper changes, walking, talking, running off to kindergarten, and then walking down that aisle for our first graduation. There are more wonderful memories to come honey! Thanks for walking through this journey of life with me! I love you more than words could ever say!

 Just a little over a week ago was July 4th. For the nation they celebrate our freedoms, but in this family its an extra special day because a sweet little baby boy joined our family on that day 16 years ago. So not only do we celebrate America we celebrate our crazy sweet Tommy

This boy came into the world happy as can be had some special care needed for him but none the less was happy all the time

He has had us smiling from the very beginning and keeps it up every day!! He is a joy and just makes our lives better because he is in them. Can't believe our baby is 16 now! WOW

It is a an honor to be this crazy boys Mom! He really does light up the room with those giggles and laughs! We truly are blessed to have him, God saved his life when he was a little baby. Urgent surgeries had to be done immediately a few weeks after birth. We know God saved him for wonderful things, could be just to bring laughter and joy to our lives, but know this, if you don't know this boys heart, then let me let you in on a secret. He loves his family VERY much, his heart is tender for those with special needs and he LOVES the Lord very much! He is a joker and a funny guy and sometimes doesn't seem to have a serious bone in his body, lets everything roll off him. But his heart is so genuine and full of love for those he cares about and it hurts for those he has lost. And one other little secret, he loves his Mom and respects his Dad very very much!!

 I know this blog has gotten long but its been kinda busy around here. Oh one more thing I HAVE to share, remember a few months ago when I said I thought God had opened a door but then He closed it? Guess how awesome our God is? That door is WIDE open for us! Swinging back and forth just waiting for us to enter. Will tell more about that later when details are worked out but just keep praying for us and what God has in store for us. He surprises us every single day! Our God is wonderful and I am still clinging to Jeremiah 29:11 oh and Proverbs 3:5-6....Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in ALL of your ways acknowledge him and HE will make YOUR path straight! Thank you Father for all your blessings and knowing the path You have for us! Praising You now for what Your doing and what Your going to do!

Blessings and Lots and lots of Ladybugs!!! :)

What just happened?

I have lots to share about the past few weeks what God has been doing, but today, today I just got the wind knocked out of me. So I felt I needed to share this first. Ever think you have just a few things figured out, finally? Only to find out that it really wasn't the plan at all?Here is how it sort of went.

You see the last six months or so, I have felt God leading me to open up and in home daycare, but the timing has been sort of off so we waited on His timing (always a good idea). And it seemed that NOW was it, summer school was over and I was no longer the "taxi service" three times a day, so I could be home and move forward with this. We have been praying about it for awhile. We really feel this will help us to bring our daughter home from China.

I had been posting my ad for weeks and was not really getting anything. So the week after summer school was out, I posted again. And within hours I had three kids ready for care, needed to meet with the Moms but it seemed all was well. I met with one mom and started watching her little girl yesterday. She came to pick her up early and I was informed that something happened at the financial end of her job and they could not keep her on right now. I was *shocked*! She still wants to use me if she finds another job but not sure when that will be. Second Mom I talked to, had all the details worked out, when they would start (two sweet ones) and just needed to meet with her today. She just emailed and said she was not sure it would work out. WHAT JUST HAPPENED????

Look I am not a naive sort of person. I know when you do good for the kingdom, Satan does not like it and tries to put roadblocks in your way. Well guess he is throwing up some HUGE ones right now. Normally they only affect my family but this is affecting other families as well. To say I was thrown off would be an understatement! I know God has a plan for all this. But the evil one likes to make us doubt all that God has done for us and what His plans are. I will NOT give up, I will NOT doubt! I have a daughter in China who needs her family whenever it may be that we are suppose to do this adoption! I am a daughter of The King of kings and I will NOT be distracted!!

In the mean time I will just cling to His word and be on my knees in prayer. I know He has called us into this adoption and no one, not even Satan will take that from us! Lord I am clinging to Your word today and Your promises You made me so long ago! The scripture You have hidden in my heart remains there to cling to! I will stand ON the Rock!! My Abba Father to comfort me and get us through this! He has never left me and He never will. Thank you Lord for your blessings and most of all for Your word and Your calling on our lives. We are still listening and will follow You! Through all the raging seas You are right in front of me.  Jeremiah 29:11 "I know the plans I have for you", declares The Lord, "plans to prosper and not to harm you, to give you HOPE and a future."  "The Lord is my light and my salvation, for whom should I fear?"  Clinging to Your word today Father! Thank you!

Blessings and Ladybugs :)

Wild Olive Tee's

Just a quick Blog update, we are in the midst of something wonderful God is doing. Just waiting to see the outcome. Promise to update really soon, but in the mean time my friends over at Wild Olive Tee's are doing something sweet for the orphans and for us too, So head on over there and check it out! These ladies are AWESOME!! Either click the link or hit the button on the side of my blog over there and it'll take you right to them. Don't forget to check out their blog while your there, some surprises going on there as well! 14 million orphans in the world, what are YOU doing to help them out and find their forever families??? Go on over and visit Wild Olive, promise you won't be disappointed!!

Blessings and Ladybugs,
Tammy

P.S. God is up to something big....stay tuned!!